I’ve always had some sense of self worth. But I lacked self-worth in some areas. Didn’t fully understand the meaning or ‘feeling’ of self worth.
One of the big areas I struggled in regarding my self worth is I let what other people said or felt about me affect me. Like many others, I was constantly bullied by boys & girls, a lot of times for how I looked on the outside.
My horrible sense of fashion, big forehead, big nose, clumsiness, big feet, no butt having, socially retarded self.
I started doubting myself..like wait maybe I’m not that great…
Lucky for me, guys only focus on the outside rather than the inside..so as I grew a little older…I became a little more confident & outgoing..& the more confident & outgoing I became..the more men I attracted. The amount of men I attracted was overwhelming. It was a game & I relished in it for awhile..but attracting men became too easy. No one enjoys easy games for too long.
Where did the next challenge lie?
The challenge lied in me dealing with someone who had got past the outside & made me realize that no matter how ‘great’ I was on the outside..my inside mattered just as much (if not more).
I started doubting myself..like wait maybe I’m not that great…
Hmm..you made me think oh yes you did, & I love you for that. & the greatest thing is people may never believe the change in me, but I don’t need you to, I don’t need anybody to. The beauty of having the Spirit in me is that my life is to be modeled after Christ, nothing that anyone says or feels will affect me, because from the day I was born he defined me! He chose me! Christ died for me, I am worth it!
So why I ever doubted myself? Because I lived for this world & when I did the opinion of the world mattered..Now I rest assured as I did as a toddler..
I am that great!
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*God-worth – [God-wurth]
–noun
the sense of God’s value or worth of you as a person; God-esteem; God-respect.
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